Drinking is hazardous to your health

Guy walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees it's filled with $10 bills. He guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it. He approaches the bartender, "What's up with the jar?" The bartender replies "Well, you pay $10 and if you pass three tests, you get the money in the jar" The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three tests?" "Pay first, thats the rule." says the bartender. So the guy gives $10 to the barkeep who puts it in the jar "OK," the bartender says. "Here's what you need to do: First, You have to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila, the whole thing, all at once... and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth. Remove the tooth with your bare hands. Third. There's a 90-year old woman upstairs who has never reached orgasm during intercourse. You've gotta make things right for her." The man is stunned. "I know I paid my $10, but I'm not an idiot, I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila, and then do those other things". "Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is." As the night drags on the man has a few drinks, then a few more. Finally he asks, "Wherez zat tequila?" He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it with a giant slurp. Tears are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up and soon the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy, scuffle. They hear the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping and then silence. Just when they think the man is surely dead, he staggers back into the bar, with his shirt ripped and large bloody scratches all over his body. "Now," he says. "Where's the old woman with the sore tooth?"